I have a coworker who is a really nice guy. He’s sweet, he loves his work and is clearly dedicated to the work we do.
But he drives me nuts.
He and I both get in to the office very early in the morning. I do this out of necessity most days—you can get so many emails answered if you don’t have to worry about other ones coming in, not to mention how easy it is to prepare for meetings before anyone else comes in and breaks the printer.
But morning times are me times. The other day Brian woke up an hour before his alarm and needed to use the bathroom. I was pretty pissed that he had so thoughtlessly interrupted my time to get ready in the morning. That’s right, I was so angry, I begrudged someone using the bathroom.
I don’t want to talk in the morning. That’s what 9am is for. Any time before 9, is off limits for chatting.
But Ted wants to chat. What’s more, Ted wants to mumble half the story and/or start the story half way through, as if I pay close attention to all his work projects and his personal life. He says things like “Friday went so well, we had two hundred people turn out and I was there until midnight,” and while he will continue, he will never explain what was happening on Friday, unless you interrupt him to ask, but this generally starts him on a whole new track.
Its sweet, really, that he wants to share the good things that are happening in our work. But I do not want to share until 9am. Today, I realized that I was going to hell when I walked into the kitchen, saw him standing by the coffee maker and then jumped back behind the door so he wouldn’t see me.
Honestly, who hides from sweet coworkers who just want to chat?!
And now I wonder how many coworkers hide when they see me coming.
Showing posts with label awkward. Show all posts
Showing posts with label awkward. Show all posts
Monday, November 7, 2011
Thursday, September 22, 2011
Soup, anyone?
The other day, Brian and I were at the co-op to buy some mulling spices. That unfortunately was an epic fail, as the co-op staff looked at me like mulling spices must be some sort of evil creation previously unknown to man and certainly never stocked on their shelves. Meh.
But, I did pause to look at the food that was on sale for super cheap because it was at the point of no return for expiration dates. There was a yummy looking red substance in a salsa jar that was only $1. $1 for presumably gourmet salsa. Delicious, no?
I came home the next day and decided it was salsa time. Brian had already eaten the salsa and claimed it to be “weak.” Since I like my salsa weak, this sounded good.
It tasted bad. Like marinara sauce.
I tried chopping up some cilantro to give it more of a salsa taste, but then it just tasted like marinara and cilantro.
After the two of us had consumed nearly half the container, I realized that despite being in a glass jar with a screw on metal top…this was tomato basil soup.
But, I did pause to look at the food that was on sale for super cheap because it was at the point of no return for expiration dates. There was a yummy looking red substance in a salsa jar that was only $1. $1 for presumably gourmet salsa. Delicious, no?
I came home the next day and decided it was salsa time. Brian had already eaten the salsa and claimed it to be “weak.” Since I like my salsa weak, this sounded good.
It tasted bad. Like marinara sauce.
I tried chopping up some cilantro to give it more of a salsa taste, but then it just tasted like marinara and cilantro.
After the two of us had consumed nearly half the container, I realized that despite being in a glass jar with a screw on metal top…this was tomato basil soup.
Wednesday, September 21, 2011
The Confrontation
I’m quite a bit behind on my blogs, so I’m writing out a bunch now and will hopefully post them over the course of several days, instead of all at once and creating blog overload.
So here’s the first one: The Confrontation
I’m not really good with confrontation (despite it being my favorite Les Mis song). I would 100% rather have someone say things about me behind my back than to my face. Confronting someone directly makes me nauseous to enact. I can daydream about all the eloquent ways I would tell them what their problems are, but actually doing it just aint gonna happen. I’ll water it down and make it friendly by the end when all I really want to do is tell someone I don’t like them, don’t like their work ethic and would rather not interact with them anymore.
But a thousand times worse is when someone confronts me. I don’t think there’s a way to confront someone that doesn’t come across as mean and puts people’s backs up against a wall. And since one of my strengths is about reducing conflict, I hate it when it crops up for me.
The other day, I had a coworker confront me via email first thing in the morning. There was some miscommunication over tone (which is common in emails), some heated emotions because of external stressors, and some very angry seeming emails sent to me. I tried to be polite, explain the miscommunications and misinterpretations and generally be pleasant back. Things were resolved, a halfhearted apology was given. But now, I’m really not sure how I can continue to work well with this person.
I feel frustrated that they assumed the worst of my emails. I feel angry that they responded to me in what I feel was a disrespecting manner. I resent that that this person ruined a perfectly good day of mine because they were flustered and decided to take it out on me. And I worry that they are going to do it again. This person isn’t a confrontation avoider, or even one that will be gentle in their confrontations. They will throw it at you head on, in all the ways I dislike. I’m having a hard time getting past these feelings and envision any good future working relationship.
The part of me that talks big visualizes a whole confrontation of my own, where I remind the coworker that I’ve created several useful documents that highlight our team strengths and show that conflict is not a good way to work with me. I explain that I was upset too by their tone and wish that they would just assume the best of me in the future, rather than the worst.
But, I’ll most likely never mention it or laugh it off if they do and act like it’s not a big deal, while silently composing blog posts about how frustrating it all is to myself.
So here’s the first one: The Confrontation
I’m not really good with confrontation (despite it being my favorite Les Mis song). I would 100% rather have someone say things about me behind my back than to my face. Confronting someone directly makes me nauseous to enact. I can daydream about all the eloquent ways I would tell them what their problems are, but actually doing it just aint gonna happen. I’ll water it down and make it friendly by the end when all I really want to do is tell someone I don’t like them, don’t like their work ethic and would rather not interact with them anymore.
But a thousand times worse is when someone confronts me. I don’t think there’s a way to confront someone that doesn’t come across as mean and puts people’s backs up against a wall. And since one of my strengths is about reducing conflict, I hate it when it crops up for me.
The other day, I had a coworker confront me via email first thing in the morning. There was some miscommunication over tone (which is common in emails), some heated emotions because of external stressors, and some very angry seeming emails sent to me. I tried to be polite, explain the miscommunications and misinterpretations and generally be pleasant back. Things were resolved, a halfhearted apology was given. But now, I’m really not sure how I can continue to work well with this person.
I feel frustrated that they assumed the worst of my emails. I feel angry that they responded to me in what I feel was a disrespecting manner. I resent that that this person ruined a perfectly good day of mine because they were flustered and decided to take it out on me. And I worry that they are going to do it again. This person isn’t a confrontation avoider, or even one that will be gentle in their confrontations. They will throw it at you head on, in all the ways I dislike. I’m having a hard time getting past these feelings and envision any good future working relationship.
The part of me that talks big visualizes a whole confrontation of my own, where I remind the coworker that I’ve created several useful documents that highlight our team strengths and show that conflict is not a good way to work with me. I explain that I was upset too by their tone and wish that they would just assume the best of me in the future, rather than the worst.
But, I’ll most likely never mention it or laugh it off if they do and act like it’s not a big deal, while silently composing blog posts about how frustrating it all is to myself.
Tuesday, September 7, 2010
First Split
When you read my blog yesterday, you might have thought to yourself "If this is the second split, when was the first?"
Ah gentle reader, that is a good question.
When Brian and I were first getting excited about our move to Paradise, we agreed that we would no longer live like college students. It was fine for Madison and for Purgatory, but in Paradise, we would live like adults. That meant no more futon in the living room. It was time for a couch.
So we moved in, got happily unpacked, and stared sadly at the open part of our living room where a couch belonged. The next weekend--when every single person we knew in Ann Arbor was out of town--we decided to buy a vacuum and look at couches.
It turns out that a vacuum cleaner was too big of an investment for us to do on our own and we decided to wait for Brian's mom to visit before buying one. But a $500 couch we were able to pick out and purchase in 45 minutes. Then came the dilemma. Do we pay $80 for delivery?
No. We pay $20 for a U-Haul and deliver it ourselves. It wasn't too scary getting the couch from the store to the van, but from the van to the apartment was another story. First we tried bringing the couch in the front door--but a staircase right inside the door would have required lifting the couch six feet in the air to get it in the building. So Brian eyeballed the back door of our building and decided we could fit the couch in that way. We hauled the couch out and around...only to find out that the door way was 1/2 an inch too small.
We put the couch down. Debated. And resigned ourselves to having to lift the couch up the stairs to make it to our apartment. We had a plan. It was time to ennact. I bent down to lift the couch with my knees, and suddenly there was a breeze where there was no breeze before. I said "Oh my god." Brian looked at me with an expression of pure joy and asked breathlessly "Did you just rip your pants?"
Six inches. Straight up the middle.
Ah gentle reader, that is a good question.
When Brian and I were first getting excited about our move to Paradise, we agreed that we would no longer live like college students. It was fine for Madison and for Purgatory, but in Paradise, we would live like adults. That meant no more futon in the living room. It was time for a couch.
So we moved in, got happily unpacked, and stared sadly at the open part of our living room where a couch belonged. The next weekend--when every single person we knew in Ann Arbor was out of town--we decided to buy a vacuum and look at couches.
It turns out that a vacuum cleaner was too big of an investment for us to do on our own and we decided to wait for Brian's mom to visit before buying one. But a $500 couch we were able to pick out and purchase in 45 minutes. Then came the dilemma. Do we pay $80 for delivery?
No. We pay $20 for a U-Haul and deliver it ourselves. It wasn't too scary getting the couch from the store to the van, but from the van to the apartment was another story. First we tried bringing the couch in the front door--but a staircase right inside the door would have required lifting the couch six feet in the air to get it in the building. So Brian eyeballed the back door of our building and decided we could fit the couch in that way. We hauled the couch out and around...only to find out that the door way was 1/2 an inch too small.
We put the couch down. Debated. And resigned ourselves to having to lift the couch up the stairs to make it to our apartment. We had a plan. It was time to ennact. I bent down to lift the couch with my knees, and suddenly there was a breeze where there was no breeze before. I said "Oh my god." Brian looked at me with an expression of pure joy and asked breathlessly "Did you just rip your pants?"
Six inches. Straight up the middle.
Monday, September 6, 2010
Second Split
I've started jogging again. I've never really cared for it, although it seems the easiest way to exercise. I know a lot of people love it, but I see it as a horrid necessity. Before my legs feel tired, my lungs are burning and my stomach hurts. There have been a few times when I've felt good as i finish, but I've never gotten a "runner's high" and have rarely felt better after running than I did before.
But today, I got off the couch and went for a short jog. Felt horrible during and after. Was glad it was over.
This evening, I played ultimate Frisbee with some friends from Brian's department. I was running up and down all over the field, barefoot with my jeans rolled up, and I loved it. There were times when I was tired, but it felt good. I felt good.
On the way to the car, I talked with one of the other players about making it a regular occurrence. I could get in shape and maybe enjoy myself a bit.
This fun idea seemed more like a necessity as I sat down in the car and felt my pants split open.
But today, I got off the couch and went for a short jog. Felt horrible during and after. Was glad it was over.
This evening, I played ultimate Frisbee with some friends from Brian's department. I was running up and down all over the field, barefoot with my jeans rolled up, and I loved it. There were times when I was tired, but it felt good. I felt good.
On the way to the car, I talked with one of the other players about making it a regular occurrence. I could get in shape and maybe enjoy myself a bit.
This fun idea seemed more like a necessity as I sat down in the car and felt my pants split open.
Saturday, June 26, 2010
Society Forum
Earlier this week, my boss offered to send anyone interested to the United States Social Forum. Despite the fact that it was being held less than 8 blocks away, we hadn’t known about the conference until the week it was happening. It sounded like a good chance for me to interact with more community members, so I signed up.
I should have realized from the title “US Social Forum” that not too many Detroiters should be in attendance. After all, the problems of Detroit aren’t replicated anywhere else (or at least that’s how Detroit feels). But I figured it would still be an opportunity to learn and dialogue about social problems.
Walking into the main hall, I felt one hundred percent out of place. I was dressed down for work, just khakis and a white shirt, but I was way too dressed up. I was also probably in the older half of the crowd.
My impression of the crowd got much worse when I went to my first workshop: Community Bike Co-ops as a Resource for Community Empowerment and Innovation. If I had known what the dress code was, I could have worn my cut off corduroys (or cut off dress pants) and paint smeared social justice graphic t-shirts too. And I hadn’t realized before the workshop that both shoes and bras were optional. I could have also worn my Birkenstocks as I knitted with tree branches instead of needles.
The content of the workshop was a bummer, as it was more about making “the most awesomest co-op possible” rather than improving transportation options for low income individuals.
But my favorite part of the workshop was the little old Pakistani man with a dyed orange beard, twelve necklaces and a variety of wooden jingling bracelets named Avatar. He kept complaining that no one was speaking loud enough. I thought it was probably because his bracelets drowned out all other noises.
At the end of the day, on the way home, I was followed by a homeless man who apparently holds degrees from UCLA, UNLV, lives in a penthouse with a pool downtown and is friends with "lots of movie stars." After two blocks i pretended my phone was ringing and answered my quiet cell phone. He asked for my number, but i was too busy talking to my phone to answer....
I should have realized from the title “US Social Forum” that not too many Detroiters should be in attendance. After all, the problems of Detroit aren’t replicated anywhere else (or at least that’s how Detroit feels). But I figured it would still be an opportunity to learn and dialogue about social problems.
Walking into the main hall, I felt one hundred percent out of place. I was dressed down for work, just khakis and a white shirt, but I was way too dressed up. I was also probably in the older half of the crowd.
My impression of the crowd got much worse when I went to my first workshop: Community Bike Co-ops as a Resource for Community Empowerment and Innovation. If I had known what the dress code was, I could have worn my cut off corduroys (or cut off dress pants) and paint smeared social justice graphic t-shirts too. And I hadn’t realized before the workshop that both shoes and bras were optional. I could have also worn my Birkenstocks as I knitted with tree branches instead of needles.
The content of the workshop was a bummer, as it was more about making “the most awesomest co-op possible” rather than improving transportation options for low income individuals.
But my favorite part of the workshop was the little old Pakistani man with a dyed orange beard, twelve necklaces and a variety of wooden jingling bracelets named Avatar. He kept complaining that no one was speaking loud enough. I thought it was probably because his bracelets drowned out all other noises.
At the end of the day, on the way home, I was followed by a homeless man who apparently holds degrees from UCLA, UNLV, lives in a penthouse with a pool downtown and is friends with "lots of movie stars." After two blocks i pretended my phone was ringing and answered my quiet cell phone. He asked for my number, but i was too busy talking to my phone to answer....
Tuesday, June 22, 2010
Think on your feet
Part of my job means that I work directly with 17 agencies that do social justice work in the area. So to further that work, I go and do site visits. I drive my little car out to where the good things happen, get a tour and chat about what’s being done.
I made plans with one of my agencies to come out and see their annual job fair. I’d get the tour, see the speaker and eat a free lunch. This was a good plan.
Plans rarely survive the first engagement.
I got to the agency, walked around a bit and then was ushered into the ballroom for lunch. I was all ready to sit in the back of the room, when the guy in charge informed me I’d be sitting at the head table. In the front of the 200 person room.
“Don’t worry, you won’t have to speak,” quickly became “You can just say hello, how you doing and a few words about United Way.”
Crap! I went from happy anonymity to sitting in the front with the executive directors (one of whom is having a little fight with United Way over a quarter of a million dollars) and needing to speak.
The session began with me quietly freaking out, sipping lemonade and texting a dozen people. I was introduced and tried to get away with just waving my hand. Nope, they gestured to the mic and I was forced to give an awkward 30 second “Hi and happy to be here.” Then I sat down and thought of all the other things I could have said.
It was a 15 on the awkward scale.
I made plans with one of my agencies to come out and see their annual job fair. I’d get the tour, see the speaker and eat a free lunch. This was a good plan.
Plans rarely survive the first engagement.
I got to the agency, walked around a bit and then was ushered into the ballroom for lunch. I was all ready to sit in the back of the room, when the guy in charge informed me I’d be sitting at the head table. In the front of the 200 person room.
“Don’t worry, you won’t have to speak,” quickly became “You can just say hello, how you doing and a few words about United Way.”
Crap! I went from happy anonymity to sitting in the front with the executive directors (one of whom is having a little fight with United Way over a quarter of a million dollars) and needing to speak.
The session began with me quietly freaking out, sipping lemonade and texting a dozen people. I was introduced and tried to get away with just waving my hand. Nope, they gestured to the mic and I was forced to give an awkward 30 second “Hi and happy to be here.” Then I sat down and thought of all the other things I could have said.
It was a 15 on the awkward scale.
Monday, June 21, 2010
Return of the Blog
So I’ve been told by just about everyone to start blogging again. So I’m ready to start.
Today, there roof of my car was covered with incapacitated flying ants. The whole roof and much of the trunk was just a field of ants with wings, laying on their backs and kicking their little legs impotently.
I bet you were hoping for something more impressive. I’ll try to do better.
Today, there roof of my car was covered with incapacitated flying ants. The whole roof and much of the trunk was just a field of ants with wings, laying on their backs and kicking their little legs impotently.
I bet you were hoping for something more impressive. I’ll try to do better.
Saturday, February 20, 2010
Sometimes, life stinks
You would think from the title, this post is going to be cranky. Sure my laptop died and sharing a computer is tough. Sure I need to read 178 FEMA applications in a week.
But that's pretty much all there is to complain about in my life. Life is good! I just got to see my sister and her new husband and had an awesome time hanging out with them. I spent time with my fantastic parents, whom i adore. My boss let me make up the hours i lost by going home for the weekend so i don't even have to expect a pay cut on the next paycheck. I am having such a good time at my job--it really is what i would have described if anyone in the world asked me what i wanted to do. Brian and I are doing great and I am quietly planning our wedding (which always makes me happy). We've made good friends here and its only 4 more months until we move to Paradise.
So why does life stink? Because I am a very gassy person. I've got two gassy stories to tell, but I'll tell the less funny one first.
We're hosting a student who is considering Ann Arbor for his own graduate studies. He's a Korean-Canadian named Jay and is very nice. Since its recruitment weekend, most of the first year students are hosting candidates. Part of hosting means that everyone had to go to an awkward party at the department chair's house. She doesn't have enough seating for everyone, so people end up standing and trying to eat Lasagna. Kevin the Texan and I did not want to go, despite the fact that our partners had to. So Kevin the Texan and I instead decided to get Qdoba, have a beer and watch movies. It was fantastic...until i remembered that we were sitting on the futon, which was where Jay was going to sleep...and Qdoba gives me gas. Hopefully it had enough time to air out before Jay went to sleep. Whoops.
Another funny but still gross story is about work. I haven't posted yet describing my office (i wrote a whole post that got eaten by my laptop when it died, so i'm waiting to get the data back first), but I'll summarize the important part. We have a few cubicles called "fish-bowls." They are glass on two sides, have walls and a sliding door that go up about 10 feet. I have been deemed temporarily important, so I have an assistant from February 15 to March 5. She does the paperwork and answers the phone for me. Its nice. She's very nice. But every morning, she wants to ask me a quick question while I'm on the way to the bathroom. I can't help it, I try to keep in the gas, but it needs to come out. I try to stand outside her cubicle, but she always wants to show me something on the computer or on the paperwork. So i always leave her in a fishbowl o' stink.
But that's pretty much all there is to complain about in my life. Life is good! I just got to see my sister and her new husband and had an awesome time hanging out with them. I spent time with my fantastic parents, whom i adore. My boss let me make up the hours i lost by going home for the weekend so i don't even have to expect a pay cut on the next paycheck. I am having such a good time at my job--it really is what i would have described if anyone in the world asked me what i wanted to do. Brian and I are doing great and I am quietly planning our wedding (which always makes me happy). We've made good friends here and its only 4 more months until we move to Paradise.
So why does life stink? Because I am a very gassy person. I've got two gassy stories to tell, but I'll tell the less funny one first.
We're hosting a student who is considering Ann Arbor for his own graduate studies. He's a Korean-Canadian named Jay and is very nice. Since its recruitment weekend, most of the first year students are hosting candidates. Part of hosting means that everyone had to go to an awkward party at the department chair's house. She doesn't have enough seating for everyone, so people end up standing and trying to eat Lasagna. Kevin the Texan and I did not want to go, despite the fact that our partners had to. So Kevin the Texan and I instead decided to get Qdoba, have a beer and watch movies. It was fantastic...until i remembered that we were sitting on the futon, which was where Jay was going to sleep...and Qdoba gives me gas. Hopefully it had enough time to air out before Jay went to sleep. Whoops.
Another funny but still gross story is about work. I haven't posted yet describing my office (i wrote a whole post that got eaten by my laptop when it died, so i'm waiting to get the data back first), but I'll summarize the important part. We have a few cubicles called "fish-bowls." They are glass on two sides, have walls and a sliding door that go up about 10 feet. I have been deemed temporarily important, so I have an assistant from February 15 to March 5. She does the paperwork and answers the phone for me. Its nice. She's very nice. But every morning, she wants to ask me a quick question while I'm on the way to the bathroom. I can't help it, I try to keep in the gas, but it needs to come out. I try to stand outside her cubicle, but she always wants to show me something on the computer or on the paperwork. So i always leave her in a fishbowl o' stink.
Monday, February 8, 2010
Up chuck
I haven't posted much lately because my computer has given up on me. It no longer wants anything to do with turning on or even lighting up. As a result, Brian and I are attempting to share his computer. Its not easy, especially because the computer is used for work, school and his main source of gaming recreation. But last night I had a few hours to myself on the computer.
Because Brian was throwing up.
He must've eaten something at the Superbowl party we went to that made him sick and his face all puffy and red. There wasn't much I could do other than get him glasses of water and work on the computer in the next room.
Listening to him being sick.
In five years, I have never been in the same building as Brian when he was vomiting. Usually it only happened when he went home to visit his folks or when I was out of town. So now we've broken what probably is the final barrier of personal space between us.
I'm not that excited.
Because Brian was throwing up.
He must've eaten something at the Superbowl party we went to that made him sick and his face all puffy and red. There wasn't much I could do other than get him glasses of water and work on the computer in the next room.
Listening to him being sick.
In five years, I have never been in the same building as Brian when he was vomiting. Usually it only happened when he went home to visit his folks or when I was out of town. So now we've broken what probably is the final barrier of personal space between us.
I'm not that excited.
Friday, November 20, 2009
The Job Hunt
So the job hunt has not gone well. I had a promising prospect with the United Way here, but it’s been over a month of decision making on their part, when originally they had planned on telling me in a week.
And while I continue applying, it’s been a very long time with no income. So this week, I broke down, swallowed my master’s degree and applied at the grocery store. I try not to be a snob about jobs, and kept telling myself that there is no shame in making a living, but it wasn’t a good day.
I knew that when I interviewed they would ask why I wanted to work there. It’s a common interview question and I always try to come up with a good answer ahead of time. For the grocery store, all I could come up with was the fact that I want money. It’s an honest answer, but I’m not sure the good folks at Kroger Co. would appreciate it.
On Thursday, I went to my interview and of course was asked why I wanted to work there. I told them it was because I want to get married soon and I need an income right away to do that. I struck gold. The woman interviewing me is still paying off her daughter’s wedding from two years ago.
I wasn’t hired on the spot, because first they have to receive my drug test results. Ahhh the workplace.
And while I continue applying, it’s been a very long time with no income. So this week, I broke down, swallowed my master’s degree and applied at the grocery store. I try not to be a snob about jobs, and kept telling myself that there is no shame in making a living, but it wasn’t a good day.
I knew that when I interviewed they would ask why I wanted to work there. It’s a common interview question and I always try to come up with a good answer ahead of time. For the grocery store, all I could come up with was the fact that I want money. It’s an honest answer, but I’m not sure the good folks at Kroger Co. would appreciate it.
On Thursday, I went to my interview and of course was asked why I wanted to work there. I told them it was because I want to get married soon and I need an income right away to do that. I struck gold. The woman interviewing me is still paying off her daughter’s wedding from two years ago.
I wasn’t hired on the spot, because first they have to receive my drug test results. Ahhh the workplace.
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
More Animals!
So I’ve seen more animals. Brian and I have seen a set of three deer all around Northwoods. They’ve been by the dumpster, grazing on the sidewalk by the engineering buildings, and right outside our door one day when Brian left for class. We had disagreed about the size of the fawns, but didn’t put it together that there were actually TWO families of three deer running around.
Until I was driving up to our apartment and found them all together. I got excited, I pulled out my camera, and I took pictures.
Unfortunately, all six would not pose together
On the way to photograph the deer, I also finally got a picture of one of our woodchuck friends
He’s a little camera shy
The most exciting encounter, once again, is the overly friendly squirrel
We encountered OFS on Sunday and on Tuesday this week. On Sunday, we were leaving our apartment to run some errands. Just as we got out the door, OFS peered around the corner of our building, in a very stalker-ish fashion. Once again OFS approached us, and the faster we ran away, the faster he followed.
We got to the car and locked ourselves in. But where was OFS? We’re too kind hearted to want to run him over, but we couldn’t find him. Then we rolled down the window.
Peekaboo!
He was right next to the car! And when I stuck my hand out to take a picture, he came closer. We tried throwing food in the opposite direction, but he was only interested in us. The noise of the car horn eventually frightened him off, but we felt it was a near miss.
Today, I got home from the grocery store and had both hands full of groceries. As I approached my door, I realized that OFS was between me and the apartment, and he wanted love. He wanted contact. I dumped half my groceries on the picnic table, skirted the squirrel and bolted for the apartment. I barely missed contact with the squirrel and had to wait until he went away to get the rest of my groceries.
And my neighbors who we don’t like (who I just gave a candle to), were watching and laughing the whole time. Dang.
Until I was driving up to our apartment and found them all together. I got excited, I pulled out my camera, and I took pictures.
Unfortunately, all six would not pose together
On the way to photograph the deer, I also finally got a picture of one of our woodchuck friends
He’s a little camera shy
The most exciting encounter, once again, is the overly friendly squirrel
We encountered OFS on Sunday and on Tuesday this week. On Sunday, we were leaving our apartment to run some errands. Just as we got out the door, OFS peered around the corner of our building, in a very stalker-ish fashion. Once again OFS approached us, and the faster we ran away, the faster he followed.
We got to the car and locked ourselves in. But where was OFS? We’re too kind hearted to want to run him over, but we couldn’t find him. Then we rolled down the window.
Peekaboo!
He was right next to the car! And when I stuck my hand out to take a picture, he came closer. We tried throwing food in the opposite direction, but he was only interested in us. The noise of the car horn eventually frightened him off, but we felt it was a near miss.
Today, I got home from the grocery store and had both hands full of groceries. As I approached my door, I realized that OFS was between me and the apartment, and he wanted love. He wanted contact. I dumped half my groceries on the picnic table, skirted the squirrel and bolted for the apartment. I barely missed contact with the squirrel and had to wait until he went away to get the rest of my groceries.
And my neighbors who we don’t like (who I just gave a candle to), were watching and laughing the whole time. Dang.
Tuesday, October 20, 2009
Table for Four
I recently watched an episode of the fantastic How I Met Your Mother that posited the theory that couples need other couples to spend time with. In the way that sitcoms do, it compared a couple on their own to a pair of couples double dating to a single person envying people in relationships.
This was one I could relate to. Ever since Brian and I have been dating, I have the need for the Couples Night. Four people going out to dinner, watching a movie or playing board games sounds like the best evening ever to me. Spending time with other people is fun, but you know it would be more fun if it was couples (even when it sometimes isn’t).
I’m sure there’s some sort of anthropological explanation—that group living benefited all, and that groups of couples provided no competition for mates etc. But I know that I have been craving a couple to spend time with since we moved to Michigan.
I’ve been hoping to make friends with a couple from Brian’s program. They’ve been dating as long as we have, they’re just as serious and they’re both students, so we understand their schedule. The hard part has been broaching the prospect of the four of us doing things on our own, without other people there.
This weekend, we invited over ½ the couple (she was out of town, but he didn’t have any plans). I suddenly reverted to the teenage girl who almost exploded when calling a boy from her parents’ basement. I had to rehearse what I was going to say first, and then run it all past my best friend (in this case, Brian). When I got the nerve to make the call, I told Brian that I hoped it would go to voice mail, saving me the need for direct interaction. And so it did. When he called back, I made Brian answer the phone. And I did a happy dance.
Hopefully this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship.
This was one I could relate to. Ever since Brian and I have been dating, I have the need for the Couples Night. Four people going out to dinner, watching a movie or playing board games sounds like the best evening ever to me. Spending time with other people is fun, but you know it would be more fun if it was couples (even when it sometimes isn’t).
I’m sure there’s some sort of anthropological explanation—that group living benefited all, and that groups of couples provided no competition for mates etc. But I know that I have been craving a couple to spend time with since we moved to Michigan.
I’ve been hoping to make friends with a couple from Brian’s program. They’ve been dating as long as we have, they’re just as serious and they’re both students, so we understand their schedule. The hard part has been broaching the prospect of the four of us doing things on our own, without other people there.
This weekend, we invited over ½ the couple (she was out of town, but he didn’t have any plans). I suddenly reverted to the teenage girl who almost exploded when calling a boy from her parents’ basement. I had to rehearse what I was going to say first, and then run it all past my best friend (in this case, Brian). When I got the nerve to make the call, I told Brian that I hoped it would go to voice mail, saving me the need for direct interaction. And so it did. When he called back, I made Brian answer the phone. And I did a happy dance.
Hopefully this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship.
Thursday, October 8, 2009
When you’re up, you’re up; and when you’re down, you’re down….
Here’s a low and a high for the last two days
The low:
On Wednesday I fell down 5 stairs in the apartment while Brian was on campus. When I got up, both my knees and my wrist hurt, and my butt was one big bruise. At first, I couldn’t put any weight on my leg, so I was really nervous. I tried calling Brian, my mom, my sister and a friend from Madison for some knee-care advice. No one answered. I told a friend that I was concerned that I could die in the apartment and be eaten by cats. She said it was unlikely, given that I did not have a cat.
The high:
I have a good lead on a job. My potential boss is hoping to be able to hire me right off with out having to post the job to the general public. It sounds like exciting work, and although the commute might be long, it will be worth the drive!
The low:
On Wednesday I fell down 5 stairs in the apartment while Brian was on campus. When I got up, both my knees and my wrist hurt, and my butt was one big bruise. At first, I couldn’t put any weight on my leg, so I was really nervous. I tried calling Brian, my mom, my sister and a friend from Madison for some knee-care advice. No one answered. I told a friend that I was concerned that I could die in the apartment and be eaten by cats. She said it was unlikely, given that I did not have a cat.
The high:
I have a good lead on a job. My potential boss is hoping to be able to hire me right off with out having to post the job to the general public. It sounds like exciting work, and although the commute might be long, it will be worth the drive!
Saturday, October 3, 2009
Say that again?
Since we made the decision to move to Michigan, I’ve applied for 30-35 jobs. And even for the jobs that I’ve kept careful track of, its hard to remember everything.
The other day I received a call from “The Ginsberg Center” asking me to set up an interview. I was excited for the interview, but had no idea whatsoever the job could possibly be. After hanging up the phone, I frantically searched for the job description. Finally, I figured out that it was one of the top four jobs that I would like the most.
Fingers crossed!
The other day I received a call from “The Ginsberg Center” asking me to set up an interview. I was excited for the interview, but had no idea whatsoever the job could possibly be. After hanging up the phone, I frantically searched for the job description. Finally, I figured out that it was one of the top four jobs that I would like the most.
Fingers crossed!
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
Hobbies
I recently went to a job interview where at the end, I was asked what my hobbies are. What did I do with my free time. I froze.
So I’ve been thinking, what would I want to say? I had been thinking of ways to meet other people here, and so far I had decided that I wanted to get involved in a church, maybe join a knitting group and look into a community garden project. But how would these play out in a job interview?
Job interview question: What do you do for fun?
Answer 1: I’m very involved in my church. It’s a Unitarian church
Possible response A: Interviewers don’t know what a Unitarian is and assume I’m just a crazy religious person.
Possible response B: Interviewers know what a Unitarian is and assume I’m just a crazy person.
Answer 2: I knit
Possible response A: You might just be a young version of an old crazy lady with cats.
Possible response B: You must be very industrious, and considerably older than you appear. Also, will you make me a sweater?
Answer 3: I garden.
Possible response A: You are someone who spends their time at work wanting to leave to go outside
Possible response B: You are cool and sporty
(I made the mistake once of telling my coworkers about my upcoming backpacking trip and my beautiful garden. Everyone assumed I was sporty and outdoorsey. They never learned the truth, but it explained many of my strange interactions with them.)
I ended up saying I liked to knit.
So I’ve been thinking, what would I want to say? I had been thinking of ways to meet other people here, and so far I had decided that I wanted to get involved in a church, maybe join a knitting group and look into a community garden project. But how would these play out in a job interview?
Job interview question: What do you do for fun?
Answer 1: I’m very involved in my church. It’s a Unitarian church
Possible response A: Interviewers don’t know what a Unitarian is and assume I’m just a crazy religious person.
Possible response B: Interviewers know what a Unitarian is and assume I’m just a crazy person.
Answer 2: I knit
Possible response A: You might just be a young version of an old crazy lady with cats.
Possible response B: You must be very industrious, and considerably older than you appear. Also, will you make me a sweater?
Answer 3: I garden.
Possible response A: You are someone who spends their time at work wanting to leave to go outside
Possible response B: You are cool and sporty
(I made the mistake once of telling my coworkers about my upcoming backpacking trip and my beautiful garden. Everyone assumed I was sporty and outdoorsey. They never learned the truth, but it explained many of my strange interactions with them.)
I ended up saying I liked to knit.
Tuesday, September 22, 2009
Supernanny
I’ve been watching the TV show Supernanny lately. I like it because I like to watch other people’s problems, and be flabbergasted at how bad the kids can be. Plus, I like to think I’m preparing for having my own kids and getting some good tips on how to work with children.
But as a social worker, I am freaked out for these families! Moms who make their kids eat soap, dad’s who are using physical punishment WAY too often, children wandering unsupervised and into unsafe situations. This week there was an episode of a mom who is already at her rope with 7 kids and a dad who is about to leave for 18 months. This sounds like a tragedy about to happen.
The shows always end on a high note with the families discussing all the ways that Supernanny has improved their relationships and their skills for interacting together; but there are definitely times when Supernanny makes a recommendation (like, don’t make your kid eat chemicals as punishment) that the parents refuse to listen to. I sit on my couch and wonder how I can contact protective services on Supernanny’s behalf (I don’t think it will work, but I fantasize about what I would say in such a call. Hello, I was watching TV and you should follow up with this family….).
Why can’t Supernanny just teach all the parents a little song that makes them perfect, safe parents who raise lovely little British children? Julie Andrews could do it.
But as a social worker, I am freaked out for these families! Moms who make their kids eat soap, dad’s who are using physical punishment WAY too often, children wandering unsupervised and into unsafe situations. This week there was an episode of a mom who is already at her rope with 7 kids and a dad who is about to leave for 18 months. This sounds like a tragedy about to happen.
The shows always end on a high note with the families discussing all the ways that Supernanny has improved their relationships and their skills for interacting together; but there are definitely times when Supernanny makes a recommendation (like, don’t make your kid eat chemicals as punishment) that the parents refuse to listen to. I sit on my couch and wonder how I can contact protective services on Supernanny’s behalf (I don’t think it will work, but I fantasize about what I would say in such a call. Hello, I was watching TV and you should follow up with this family….).
Why can’t Supernanny just teach all the parents a little song that makes them perfect, safe parents who raise lovely little British children? Julie Andrews could do it.
Thursday, September 17, 2009
Techno Guilt
When I was a kid, I thought that in the future, we’d have all sorts of talking gadgets. “Hello, Refrigerator.” “Good morning Jenny, would you like some milk.” “Yes, please. Tell Microwave I said hi.”
Brian got me a GPS for my birthday. Every time I turn it on, I imaging these same conversations. “Please take me to the grocery store.” My GPS’ voice is not as friendly, and the conversation is sparse, but its still a fun little fantasy.
Unless you don’t follow the directions properly. Every time I miss a turn or overshoot an exit, my GPS says “Recalculating.”
Yesterday I went for a job interview on a road with several detours. Every time I left the directed route, my GPS chided me with a “recalculating.” Now, I know the voice tone doesn’t change, but I swear, the voice became more scornful, more annoyed and louder every time. I became anxious, I contemplated driving on the road with the construction just to avoid the voice! Every thing I did it was watching, and judging me, and criticizing me! I started apologizing to the GPS, begging it to stay calm and that I’d get back on track as soon as I could, if it would just give me a moment!
Then I remembered; there’s a mute feature.
Brian got me a GPS for my birthday. Every time I turn it on, I imaging these same conversations. “Please take me to the grocery store.” My GPS’ voice is not as friendly, and the conversation is sparse, but its still a fun little fantasy.
Unless you don’t follow the directions properly. Every time I miss a turn or overshoot an exit, my GPS says “Recalculating.”
Yesterday I went for a job interview on a road with several detours. Every time I left the directed route, my GPS chided me with a “recalculating.” Now, I know the voice tone doesn’t change, but I swear, the voice became more scornful, more annoyed and louder every time. I became anxious, I contemplated driving on the road with the construction just to avoid the voice! Every thing I did it was watching, and judging me, and criticizing me! I started apologizing to the GPS, begging it to stay calm and that I’d get back on track as soon as I could, if it would just give me a moment!
Then I remembered; there’s a mute feature.
Monday, September 14, 2009
A bath for two
When Brian and I first moved into our new place, we weren’t happy, but we quickly decided that we could deal. I even started to like the place. It didn’t seem too different from Eagle Heights, and its still has more space than some apartments we’ve lived in before.
So the current excitement isn’t from the space or the apartment staff, it’s our new neighbors.
The neighbors are a family with two grandparents, two parents and one developmentally disabled son. The grandparents often take their grandson out to play infront of our apartments, sitting on the benches outside and look directly into our living room. They don’t seem to think its awkward when they make eye contact with us while we’re trying to watch TV or eat dinner.
The son is non verbal and makes moaning noises both to communicate and otherwise. With our thin walls, we’ve been able to hear the son’s noises, but yesterday was a whole new level of communal living.
I decided to take a bath, relax and read a book. The only room that actually shares a wall between our two apartments is the bathroom, and this was the first time that I spent a lot of time in there since the new neighbors move in.
I’ll be honest, I was in the tub for several hours during the middle of the day. Sure it’s a bit self indulgent, but I’m unemployed, I need some pampering. Anyway, this was apparently also the same time that the family was giving their son a bath, someone else was taking a shower, several people used the bathroom (while talking on the phone, or to another person in the apartment) and the linen closest was being cleaned.
Every thing they did, sounded as if it was coming from our apartment. I was fine with the talking, I tuned it out. I dealt with the linen closet opening and closing, and the shower running. When the kid started screaming and crying about getting a bath, I gave up.
Call me weird, but it just seems wrong to take a bath with someone else’s kid.
So the current excitement isn’t from the space or the apartment staff, it’s our new neighbors.
The neighbors are a family with two grandparents, two parents and one developmentally disabled son. The grandparents often take their grandson out to play infront of our apartments, sitting on the benches outside and look directly into our living room. They don’t seem to think its awkward when they make eye contact with us while we’re trying to watch TV or eat dinner.
The son is non verbal and makes moaning noises both to communicate and otherwise. With our thin walls, we’ve been able to hear the son’s noises, but yesterday was a whole new level of communal living.
I decided to take a bath, relax and read a book. The only room that actually shares a wall between our two apartments is the bathroom, and this was the first time that I spent a lot of time in there since the new neighbors move in.
I’ll be honest, I was in the tub for several hours during the middle of the day. Sure it’s a bit self indulgent, but I’m unemployed, I need some pampering. Anyway, this was apparently also the same time that the family was giving their son a bath, someone else was taking a shower, several people used the bathroom (while talking on the phone, or to another person in the apartment) and the linen closest was being cleaned.
Every thing they did, sounded as if it was coming from our apartment. I was fine with the talking, I tuned it out. I dealt with the linen closet opening and closing, and the shower running. When the kid started screaming and crying about getting a bath, I gave up.
Call me weird, but it just seems wrong to take a bath with someone else’s kid.
A walk with the Scientists
On Saturday, Brian and I went to the annual Ecology and Evolutionary Biology department getaway. We drove out to somewhere in the woods for a day of hiking, games, food and meeting other students and their families from the department.
The un-funny part of the story is that we met several students who were a lot of fun and are looking forward to becoming friends with.
The more interesting part of the day was the activities. We started the day with a nature walk to a local bog and fen. I was excited to go for a nice hike in nature with people who were so knowledgeable about the surroundings. I thought it might be like when I was a kid and we’d go for walks with our dad who would point out animal tracks and the different kinds of trees as we hiked. “There’s a maple. There’s a really big maple. I think that’s a walnut.”
We started out walking through the woods. Five minutes into the walk our guide pointed out “most of the ground cover we are walking through is toxicodendron radicans, poison ivy.” The members of our group with sandals and shorts looked uncomfortable and I was happy that I had decided to leave on my jeans for the walk.
We stopped a bit further in to learn about a certain type of bush. Both its Latin and colloquial names, as well as which butterflies (both their Latin and colloquial names) are most likely to be found on the bushes.
We continued walking, only to stop again to learn more Latin.
This set the pace for the hike. Three or four minutes of hiking punctuated by five minutes of learning. Our group also had a fungi expert, so we got to learn all about that as well as plants and the general ecosystem of bogs and wetlands.
So the morning was nerdy, but the afternoon was even more so.
We had a photo scavenger hunt, which I usually get very competitive about. I imagined being given a list of things like: funny looking pant formations, a robin, a deer track, a seed, a leaf. I should have known better.
The list included: decomposition, mutualism, neutral theory, microhabitat, two species of the same genus, carbon cycle, interspecific competition, phenotypic plasticity, niche theory, and polyploidy, among others. The ecologists all thought this was the best game ever.
Apparently having an old guy hold a card that says “senescence” is hilarious to ecologists.
I’m sure over time I’ll pick up the concepts and jokes. For now, I’m happy to be the photographer.
The un-funny part of the story is that we met several students who were a lot of fun and are looking forward to becoming friends with.
The more interesting part of the day was the activities. We started the day with a nature walk to a local bog and fen. I was excited to go for a nice hike in nature with people who were so knowledgeable about the surroundings. I thought it might be like when I was a kid and we’d go for walks with our dad who would point out animal tracks and the different kinds of trees as we hiked. “There’s a maple. There’s a really big maple. I think that’s a walnut.”
We started out walking through the woods. Five minutes into the walk our guide pointed out “most of the ground cover we are walking through is toxicodendron radicans, poison ivy.” The members of our group with sandals and shorts looked uncomfortable and I was happy that I had decided to leave on my jeans for the walk.
We stopped a bit further in to learn about a certain type of bush. Both its Latin and colloquial names, as well as which butterflies (both their Latin and colloquial names) are most likely to be found on the bushes.
We continued walking, only to stop again to learn more Latin.
This set the pace for the hike. Three or four minutes of hiking punctuated by five minutes of learning. Our group also had a fungi expert, so we got to learn all about that as well as plants and the general ecosystem of bogs and wetlands.
So the morning was nerdy, but the afternoon was even more so.
We had a photo scavenger hunt, which I usually get very competitive about. I imagined being given a list of things like: funny looking pant formations, a robin, a deer track, a seed, a leaf. I should have known better.
The list included: decomposition, mutualism, neutral theory, microhabitat, two species of the same genus, carbon cycle, interspecific competition, phenotypic plasticity, niche theory, and polyploidy, among others. The ecologists all thought this was the best game ever.
Apparently having an old guy hold a card that says “senescence” is hilarious to ecologists. I’m sure over time I’ll pick up the concepts and jokes. For now, I’m happy to be the photographer.
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